Spouse in Open Marriage Backed for Divorcing Husband Who Brought Lover Home

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A person in an open relationship shared how they were glad they walked in on their husband having sex with a partner in a Reddit post that has received over 12,000 upvotes and hundreds of comments.

Statistics report that around 4 to 9 percent of American adults engage in some sort of open relationship. Fifty-one percent of people say that they would be open to the idea of ​​dating someone who is married, but 56 percent said that they believed open relationships were morally wrong.

Reddit user u/ALittleBitOfaWacko shared their story a year after their husband Matthew announced he wanted an open marriage.

“His reasoning was that he was no longer sexually attracted to me,” explained the poster. “He didn’t want us to get a divorce because he still loved me. He insisted that we could continue being a happy couple that did not act sexually with one another. We would have our sexual needs met by someone who we would/could consider to be our other partner.”

Man upset and couple together
A split image including a stock photo of a man looking upset, left, and a file photo of a couple in bed together smiling, right. The internet has applauded a Redditor for asking for a divorce after finding their husband in bed with another partner.
AntonioGuillem/javi_indy/Getty Images

Initially hurt by the suggestion and explaining that their husband had insulted him frequently, the poster agreed to an open marriage because they didn’t want the relationship to end.

After the agreement, the couple came up with a set of rules, including that they had to introduce each other to their partner, could have sex with other people but had to tell each other about it, that they had to get tested regularly for STDs , that they would never have sex with their partner in their shared home, and that they could build emotional relationships with someone else but it could not be taken as far as love.

Just weeks after Matthew announced that he wanted to open their marriage, he came home with his new partner, Jamie.

“Jamie is so pretty,” said the poster. “He looks like an angel. A fresh-faced, beautiful boy, with the utmost perfect smile, the literal definition of youth. I had never been more intimidated in my life… The introduction was so embarrassing. I had no idea what to say I just wanted to cry.”

The day before, the poster decided to head home from work on their lunch break to take a quick nap before returning to work and came home to find their husband and Jamie having sex in their bed.

“I was shocked and didn’t really know what to do, so I just left and went back to work,” said the Redditor. “I honestly wasn’t even tired anymore. As I was walking into work, I saw that I was being bombarded with texts and calls from both of them so I just turned my phone off. I got out of work around 9 pm, but I didn’t want to go home. I went to a movie and just drove around after… I fell asleep on the side of the road and returned home at 8 am this morning to get ready for work.”

When they arrived home that morning, the poster found their husband and Jamie at the table. “I told them good morning and went and got ready for work,” he said. “Matthew followed me yelling saying that what I did was wrong and my reaction was compelled uncalled for. He told me I was ‘being overdramatic’ and had him up all night worried because I ‘wanted to act like a child.'”

“I don’t know what came over me, but I stopped him mid-sentence and asked for a divorce,” said the Redditor.

The poster’s husband was shocked and told them to think it over, but they revealed they were pleased it happened.

“This was a breakthrough for me,” wrote the Redditor. “I usually let people walk all over me, but I didn’t let him do it again today. I didn’t want the open marriage and I don’t want someone who puts me second.”

Reddit users rushed to share their reactions and thoughts to the story, overwhelmingly siding with the poster.

One commenter wrote: “Good for YOU for putting yourself first this time. Matthew sounds like the type to have a membership at a buffet. Dude totally wants his cake and wants to eat it too.”

“So glad you stood up and stood your ground,” said another reply: “He doesn’t have your back, so you have to.”

Another reply said: “That arrangement sounded rough on you to say the least. Regarding your soon-to-be ex… he’s trying to gaslight you. You had clear rules for your arrangement, and he broke them. Your reaction was totally warranted.”

“Notice how he tries to turn things on you saying your reaction was out of line even though it was him who broke the rules?” said another reply: “Good for you, divorce his a** and live your life.”

Newsweek has reached out to u/ALittleBitOfaWacko for comment. We were unable to verify the details of this case.

Has an infidelity broken your trust in your partner? Let us know via life@newsweek.com. We can ask experts for advice, and your story could be featured on Newsweek.

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